tehlikeli

I think its easy for me to deal with little frustrations that life throws at me. However i have come to realize that when i "deal" with those frustrations i mostly just try to forget about them. Then they all seem to add up in the back of my mind and eventually i have one big break down. For me that was two nights ago. One little thing triggered it and i think all my emotions came tumbling out. I had some supportive friends try to cheer me up. I went home and had some much needed conversations with friends at home, since it was normal time there. then the next day, had some very concerned turks check up on me. I felt a little bad about some crap i said about their country but to be honest. For the majority i feel like its true things. I have been incredibly lucky to find a few of those level headed intelligent ones and they showed that by their concern and caring for me over the past year and a half.

On to the caring turks, i realized how much better/ easier my life is here because i teach adults. I cant count the ways they have made my adjustment to this city better. I know if i need anything they are definitely ready and willing to help me. For example, here if you need anything medical you dont go to the doctor you go to the pharmacy tell them your problem and they give you medicine. However finding english speaking pharmacies are a bit tricker. luckily in my level 5 weekend class (very good speakers) i have two pharmacists. I talked to them about my problems and its easily fixed. They were glad to help me.

Another issue that i've been encountering a lot lately is the term "dangerous" or "tehlikeli" in turkish. Everyone and everything is "tehlikeli" Its actually a bit comical to me. I was talking with one my students last weekend. She asked how often i go out. I said maybe once a week. She said, "oh i dont go out" I asked why. She said before she was never allowed to but at age 23 she would get permission but she doesnt want to go out now. She has learned to live a life in the house and not go out. I asked, well you dont want to go drink coffee with your friends on the weekends? She said "maybe, you know i can get permission now, because im older, but istanbul is dangerous, i should just go home" I was a bit in awe. Yes i understand its a city of 17 million people. Yes i understand there are crappy people here, Yes i understand that people are out to scam you here. Buuuuuuuuut, i do feel a whole lot safer here(minus the threat of earthquakes and suicide bombers) I just dont see the random muggings, held up at gunshot, type situation that freaks me out about american cities.

When i explain to my students i live in tarlibasi (which in their minds is the bronx in new york) they get very worried about me. I tell them its not so bad. That i actually feel safer walking home at 2am there and I would never be so daring to do so in America. I've gone out with my students a bunch lately and i swear every other word is "he is dangerous, they are dangerous, that place is dangerous" but what causes this? Is it the fear placed in their minds from over protective parents? I was walking down the street and they freaked out about my purse which was zipped up and next to me. I'm not an idiot, i know how to act in a city, but they are extremely worried. I worry that parents put fear in their children to keep them at home, or to slightly brainwash them. Apparently its working as they are constantly paranoid. Why not just teach intelligence. I think i like that option a whole lot better. I guess i'll talk to some of my educated turkish friends about this. Hopefully its not a "dangerous" subject.