every time lie

One pattern that has repeatedly shown up this time around has been the need to lie. I know all people tell lies. Its a habit we all find ourselves in sometimes, however, there is a different attitude towards lying here.

The lying topic is one of my favorite conversation topics in class. Every class i begin I start with the ice breaker game: two truths and lie, where each person says two true things about themselves, and one lie. I stump them every time when i say i have swum from America to Canada. Suckers...! Back to the point. More than once I have had students recite their 3 statements and we all take our guesses the student then confesses, " they are all true teacher, I don't lie." Frustrating, yes, and true? Definitely not. I normally catch them in a lie within the next two minutes and try to publicly shame them. I'm sure many people are cringing at this tactic but it normally works for me!

About a month ago I had the lying conversation in one of my upper level, and in my opinion pretty educated classes, they gave me a satisfactory answer. "Christy, we lie about everything, even things that aren't important. It is a big problem!" She then proceeded to tell me about a friend of hers who physically can't not lie. She asked him questions that were not important in which she knew the answers to and he blatantly lied to her. She asked why he lied to her, he said its out of boredom or its just a psychological problem.

Its one thing to lie in the sales industry, I think a whole new situation when you feel the need to lie to close friends and family. I have caught my students and friends in quite obvious lies, and they don't feel embarrassed they just cant believe I don't believe them. They feel completely normal. Normal? why is this normal. Have I been blindsided by everyone my whole life. Does this exist everywhere? Is this what our society has come to?

There is absolutely no trust. I want to say that this is why family is so important in the culture but i don't really think that is it. I hear them constantly telling lie after lie to their families.

This is a problem here, and its not only the Turks. I have caught myself telling more lies while I'm here and I have definitely caught people I thought I trusted in serious lies to myself as well. It just confirms the fact that you are who you surround yourself with.

Which brings me to my next topic, I crave changing my surroundings. Yes, I found some really cool people to be my friends for my time here, but they aren't the people that challenge me in the way I want to be challenged. They are all very intellectual people and have definitely taught me about culture, different cultures, and history. They have put very different perspectives on my beliefs and values. They have challenged me in very different ways than I've been challenged before. However, my realization that it is time to return to the US is very largely based on changing my surroundings. I felt as though my friends and family in the US challenge me to do good with my life, at the same time having me question why I do things. Before i was bored with that and wanted to change things up. I did that. It was great, I grew a lot, I changed a lot. Ever since I was a child I wanted to help others, I wanted to feel selfless in some aspect. I wanted to give more than I took. In a country of so much need, I feel helpless. I can't change anything. The resources aren't available. Thus, i must make due, find my niche and help where I can and make plans for the future.

Finally, my time is starting to come to an end. And i'm already freaked out about going back. I had to make a lot of changes in order to uproot my life. I'm afraid of scarring relationships, and changing so much that the existing relationships wont be what I remembered. The values, the ideals, the pace of life is so different than what I have been used to, it definitely freaks me out. But, it happens so much to me, I think I can handle anything thrown at me.